I believe that i am a good hearted person.  I would like to believe that man, in general, is good hearted, but i can't. there is way too much shit that happens in this world that proves that man is ultimately evil.  I know that this is not true to many people that i know and have personal relationships and even people that i do not know or have never even seen before.  On that note, I do not deserve anything that i have, and I think that i have honestly come to believe that tonight. Within the past hour even. I have so much in this world that is unbelievable. I have a car, I have a house, I have knowledge, I have a bed, I have food, I have a job, I have health, I have a family, I have friends, I have love, I have money, I have a table, I have a chair, I have a pillow, I have light, I have a camera, I have a guitar, I have a dog, I have a yard, I have shoes, I have the privilage to buy more shoes if i see fit, I have two arms, two legs, ten fingers, ten toes, two eyes, two ears and a mouth. I have Life.  I truly just realized that i have all of these things which i do not deserve and many of which i do not need.  How can I as a human being be happy in life knowing that i have all of these things and there are many people who have very few or none of these things?  There is one man that has helped me realize this. I cannot tell you his name. I cannot tell you where he is from or how old he is. I cannot tell you if he has friends or a family. I cannot really tell you what he looks like. If he glanced at me, he could probably tell you just as much about me as i can about him. What i do know about him is that he has had a stroke. He appears not to have much money, or much of anything else for that matter.  I noticed this man about a month ago in the Wal-Mart parking lot.  He was parked in a handicapped space while i sat across the aisle from him watching him through my rear view mirror.  This man could not have looked more alone than he did while he was trying to unload his wheelchair from the back of his car, or at least i didn't think he could. I have noticed him just about everytime i have been to Wal-Mart since, and i always thought that he was a brave man. To be on his own, living independently, and doing his own shopping and getting himself around. I am naive.  I saw this man again tonight in the Wal-Mart parking lot, although this time he was not shopping. He was not loading his car. He was sleeping, in his car. Alone. This man has absolutely nothing. He can hardly walk, can't move one arm, and cannot even afford to have a bed to sleep in.  The moment i saw this man, my heart stopped, my lungs collapsed, and my muscles lost any strength they may have had. This was the absolute most humbling experience of my life. I have everything in the world i could ever hope for, and this man hopes to someday have something. I cannot imagine going one more day without helping this man, and i don't think im going to. I know I don't have enough money to give this man a great life, or even to give him a good life, but i swear that from now on, everyday i see this man, i will try my hardest to make his life better somehow.

Good luck to you all, and i hope that someday we can all have something.

I love you.